An idea has been sitting with me for a little over two years. To be able to host my very own in-person workshop. To be able to share my knowledge and tools with an audience I could exchange energy with in person. Coming out of the pandemic, putting myself out there became a little more complicated. So, I decided to attend a few workshops and group spaces.
One of the first ones I joined was Miss Dhanusha’s self-care workshop; I loved it. The entire experience was beautiful, grounding and connected.
When I got home, I thought that it was time I made this need of mine a reality. I emailed the lovely host, Dhanusha, and asked her that we collaborate and host another workshop together.
She asked for my idea and contribution to content, and then everything else went from there. Next, we met, discussed, designed, and hosted a workshop together.
Not without its challenges and self-growth. But, let me share with you the delightful day it was all executed.
The Hosts
Miss Dhanusha D.
I want to say chilled like a cold glass of a minty lemony mojito, with just enough zest. She’s got moves, tenacity, and courage & it is all packed under this content, calm exterior with such grace.
Hosting this in-person workshop has been a pleasurable experience because the first decision was to choose a brilliant co-host.
Dhanusha is a strong-willed, courageous & compassionate person. She lives through connection & the embodiment of self-care. As a coach, she actively acknowledges her needs, acts on them, and observes the needs of others in her interactions.
We’ve come to so many spaces where we faced challenges & differences in views, ideas & needs. But, we overcame them individually within ourselves and together as co-hosts in a respectful & mature manner.
Presenting alongside Dhanusha on the day of our workshop was such a content feeling. She is attentive, kind, forthcoming & willing. Her instinct was to put me first when it came to my general well-being. I was then able to execute my presentation in a coherent space & mindset. There is an aura around her when meeting in person. That attentiveness sees you as a whole person showing up in all your glory.
She provided the perfect co-regulation for my nervous system with her take-it-as-it-comes calm demeanour. You will find those values across her platforms, where she shares self-care tips and practices as a coach here.
Her presentation, filled with understanding and openness, held so much value. An invitation to share unjudged & welcomed exuded from her persona as she held space for us all in her session. I am grateful to have been challenged, pushed, held & grown beside her in this collective experience. It all flowed as we hosted the workshop together in harmony.
Ferhensha G. The me
Most say it is difficult to talk about or write about oneself. It gives me a tangible outlet to affirm my positive views on who I am and how I show up in my interactions. The more I was required to visit my identity, the more I began to enjoy writing about myself.
If I had to choose a drink, I would say a long island iced tea virgin because I am Muslim. If I were to choose an alcoholic beverage to relate to, it would be Jack and Coke. Ha-ha, the passion is always there, bubbling under the surface. I have conviction in the tools I share, which will come through in my sharing. I get very passionate, very quickly. With anxiety holding my hand lovingly, always there to reel me in and protect my well-being. Becoming so enmeshed in the now makes me forget the data I was supposed to touch. Engaging with what is right in front of me and taking it as it comes works better, therefore finding that I lose myself in that moment and interaction.
It happened with my presentation. I just went with the general idea and solution and then fell in with what everyone needed to understand from me in the interactions rather than covering what my notes said I should.
It was beautiful, connected, and deep. It was individual, responsive, and interactive. Having hosted the workshop together helped bring both our strengths in.
I am a Self-Awareness & Heartmath coach. I share much of that work and my self-work on my Instagram platform and this website.
The Venue
A sustainable clothing brand boasting affordable, inclusive pieces made from deadstock fabric. They are lightening its footprint and making it its mission to create global brand awareness that balances fairness, transparency, and mindfulness towards a greener fashion revolution. You will find their pieces showcased on their social media platform here.
There is a beautiful café attached to the studio where you can find and purchase a variety of sustainable goodies. There is no limit to their offerings in products and authentically designed and created pieces of clothing.
The Workshop
We hosted our workshop in the café area, which they arranged for us in a long boardroom style set up. The large wooden pieces, greenery, and sustainable products all around give the entire space an earthy grounding feel. It was beautiful and calming.
The Staff
Studio Candor staff on hand were forthcoming, excellent, and attentive hosts. They were willing to help in whatever our needs were, allowing everything to run as smoothly as it did. They did our photography and managed the music and the drinks station. There wasn’t anything we could have asked for that they did not take in their stride to assist us with.
Do not hesitate for a second to host your event with them. It is around three thousand rands for the venue hire. They have a few options you can add on, like having the barista there for the duration of your event.
They ran a fantastic venue hire special for September, which we took advantage of; I am sure there will be many more. Look on their pages and website for more details and support the outstanding work and mission they stand for.
Appreciation
We want to extend a special thank you to one of the owners. The lovely and all-talented Ashby of Studio Candor. Without whom, our workshop would have been much more stressful. Ashby was like a saving grace and helping hand throughout the event, which we are grateful for.
Find them at 2 Scott Road, Observatory, Cape Town. You will be so pleasantly pleased you visited if you do.
The content
Miss D
Selfcare coach Dhanusha walked us through our purpose in life and the value of knowing where lies our identity. We spoke about the mindset we need to adopt. And how we bring all those in integration with each other to find our Ikigai. Then the ways we can use it to the best of our ability to benefit our lives.
As always, she encourages beginning with a brain dump to clear the heaviness of the mind. This always works beautifully, as sometimes you may not know how much you carry in your thoughts.
It can be surprising how stumped this question may have you. Not many of us consider consciously sitting with this idea and view. She gently leads the conversation and inner self-reflection on everyone’s needs. The needs that aren’t physical and attached to bodily survival. This aspect truly opened the floor up to valuable discussions and shares.
Deep Dive
As she deep-dived into the concept of the Ikigai. Everyone became aware of their purpose. They realised how their core identity could be the driving force leading them down different paths. She coaxed her audience into a series of questions that they could answer and determine their individual Ikigai.
Once there was more understanding of the depth of our choices and the context from which they arrive, it was time to introduce and compare what having a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset can do for you and how they can affect the decisions and life choices we make.
Everyone had a lot to reflect on. There were a lot of blocks and preconceived perceptions to consider from a different mindset vantage point.
Mine
So, I just threw everyone into the deep end and turned some perspectives upside down. A view is entirely dependent on the host. Your perception is most of the time set in the type of environment your body is in at that moment. So whatever emotional state you’re in is the direction your perception will take of the experience you’re engaging in.
The nervous system is one of the significant contributors. When your nervous system is jam-packed with information like hunger. Then that’s the streams of data it is sending to your brain and heart. Being occupied with hunger you are certainly not going to have an informed, open and transparent perspective. Your entire system will be busy trying to acquire food. That will be your current emotional state.
From the awareness of that emotional state, you will begin to feel certain things. You will feel hunger, irritability, lack of concentration or focus and maybe even boredom.
The tools
I introduced tools we can use to get our nervous systems physiologically to a neutral point. At this point, we can add other tools to tip it to an emotional state that’s more beneficial for us. This will allow us unclouded coherent interactions and embodied experiences.
As we engaged in live practice, everyone could follow and see tangible proof. We interpreted the results and saw the actual change.
I introduced a discussion about those excellent hormones like cortisol and DHEA, how they serve us and how they don’t. The effect they have on our bodies to operate optimally. Also how the type of lives we lead, has been under duress therefore we’re operating in excess of cortisol. This tells us how we show up and why we show up this way daily, stressed and anxious.
The Heart
Discovering the power of the heart, where my most vital work lies, prompts me to let everyone know its benefits. The heart’s power exudes through every interaction we have with others and the world. It affects the spaces we hold and the energy we give off or receive.
The Concluded Session
To conclude, Dhanusha and I guided everyone through a journaling and transformation session of neurographic art.
In this space, we manifested on paper the fears which were holding us back. We opened it up to areas in our minds which we’ve blocked, hidden or not yet tapped into. The art assisted us in moving through those fears and challenges from a different context of space within our brains.
We expanded on our neural pathways and gave way to letting go. Releasing control and just unconsciously allowing ourselves to be and explore within our minds and varying forms of intelligence.
When fighting against old patterns of our brain, there will be deep feelings and emotional states of anxiety or overwhelm.
There are techniques and ways one can move through these in neurographic art. These techniques will assist you in letting go and freely exploring the page with natural lines void of direction.
Wrap Up
As the holding of space concluded. I hoped in my heart that the value of the work imparted would be reflected upon and practised moving forward. I hoped everyone who shared in the space will share with those they come to hold space for.
The Space
Together we held a space free of judgement and pressure. It was like coming into an embrace of openness. We all felt it very welcoming to share in our depths and experiences. Whilst keeping it professional, it was also very personal.
All created a sense of comfort and ease in the environment. There was also flow, and everyone accepting of the invitation to be held.
When deep work ends
It is not to say that something is less valuable if you feel depleted afterwards. Deep work takes energy. Everyone requires a different source of replenishment according to what their nervous systems perceive as delicious and valuable.
Sometimes, even if energy is replenishing, it may not be the type of energy we are used to receiving. Therefore, we don’t yet perceive it as valuable and replenishing.
If one has constantly delivered great work under pressure, your system may perceive stressful situations and the rush of adrenaline as energy-inducing awesomeness. It may also ignore the absolute lows and shut down after such a high. Therefore one will constantly seek out that kind of environment, thinking that those situations energise us.
When faced with an environment which is more laid back, attentive, and gives more compliments than criticism. Our systems may go into panic mode because we may be unable to receive that kind of energy and data.
We may not know what to do with it or how to respond to it. So, all that effort it takes to dissect and get used to this treatment or energy takes energy too.
Usage of the Energy
It is crucial for us to sit with depth and truly ascertain the long-term effects of our energy-seeking tendencies. What they are, why they are, how they came to be, and if they genuinely serve our whole system.
Receiving energy also takes a toll on the body and mind. It is a lot to absorb and use up. So after a deep interactive fantastic workshop, I needed a whole day for my body to regain equilibrium.
I hope everyone who attended allowed their bodies and minds to find that balance again.
Give yourself a chance to take deep rest and allow yourself the simple pleasures to expel energy collected. Try to let your body restore balance by engaging in low activity that enables absorption of all the energy received.
I am super proud of the individuals I surround myself with. Those I engage with, cheer and stand beside as we continuously engage ourselves in this kind of work.
The work of healing, connectedness and thriving.
May you all find spaces to be held and encouraged in your becoming of self-thriving, awareness and care.
Hope to see you at the next one. Pre-book your spot now via email under individual on my website.
Lots of love,
F.
by barely parenting